and in keeping with that theme
1. I believe that there's a good chance that life exists elsewhere in the universe.
2. Everyone may or may not share this belief.
3. I would never consider flooding your email box with propaganda pushing this point. That would be considered rude.
4. Religious beliefs are not completely unlike my belief in the probability of alien life.
5. Everyone may not share these beliefs.
6. Does it not then follow that I shouldn't be receiving the same religious propaganda in my mailbox every day?

Or is there something inconsistent in my logic?

It bothers me that my friends and family, who should theoretically know me better, still engage in this. I hope I don't sound too snarky, but I really do find it more irritating than your garden-variety spam.
5/31/2002 10:36:51 AM  



holy logic, batman!
Like Gordon, I've earned a "Medal of Distinction" (no direct hits, bit two bullets) on Battleground God.

Are your religious beliefs rationally consistent? Play and find out.
5/30/2002 05:28:46 PM  



bordumb
I wish I had something witty, exciting, or uplifting to say. But I happen to be at one of those timeplaces where everything is annoying or dim. Like I'll be toiling away at the same thankless schedule forever, with no money and just enough energy to exist (or at some other robot job with more money but even less energy), eventually collapsing into a wrinkled, infertile, bitter husk.

It will pass.

But for now, can I just curl up on the couch with a book and some cold drink?
5/30/2002 02:46:22 PM  



very bad things
Theft is bad.

When two adults witness a theft, report it, and the thief baldly lies in defense, it's worse.

But when the powers-that-be take the side of said thief, and completely dismiss the crime... That's catastrophic, and I fear for the future of our country.
5/29/2002 05:58:48 PM  



one cat post every few months. it won't kill you.
It's the simple things that turn cats into kittens. I replaced the hood cord in one of my jackets (the ends were disgustingly chewed, thanks to the feline that has a penchant for swallowing and puking string, blech), frayed the end of the old one into a fluffy tuft and tied a big throat-proof knot, and threaded the other end through a slit in the lid of a 35mm film canister (as kind of a handle). And it drives all three nuts. They'd chase it around the apartment forever, if I never tired of dragging and twirling it.

It's not frisbee-throwing, but it's all we've got.
5/28/2002 03:50:49 PM  



not dead. yet.
I guess it's been a few days, huh? Not much happening to speak of. Lots of resting, reading, still avoiding the theaters. Didn't accomplish anything on my mental checklist. Did make major headway on Redesign Attempt #2. With a liberating new "Arrrgh! Screw it!" disregard for old browsers. C'est la vie.

Got my trial issue of ReadyMade, already used one of the ideas (recycled watering can).

So, yeah. I'll be at work from 7 am 'til 8 pm today. 13 hours, if you're nasty.

I'll be back.
5/28/2002 05:31:08 AM  



so I could just not buy them anymore...
I understand the "clean, smooth" look for pants. But when you've got approximately half a minute to use the restroom, that button that faces inwards is the most frustrating thing in the world.
5/23/2002 11:58:58 AM  



bliss
Sure, today was an up-at-4:30 Wednesday. But it was also a short day.

If only I could bottle the feeling I had driving home, and save it for Mondays.
5/22/2002 02:20:27 PM  



modern archaeology
Standardized testing going on for the past two weeks, and my next book fair(e) next week. While I had a class using my room as a test site this morning, I decided to use the "free" time to take a trip to Staples to get some decorating supplies.

I returned to my car afterwards, hands full of bags and poster board, digging for my keys in my purse. And there was so much crap in there, I couldn't find them. Even when I put down all my stuff against the car, and dug in earnest, it took me about two minutes to fish them out.

So what did I find in there instead? An old car wash ticket. My only-seven-cents-left JoAnn gift card. A photocopy of the back of a pattern for which I was hunting down fabric. Two dollars. A mini-CD. Some auto registration paperwork. Badly-printed digital pics from Vegas that I took to Michigan with me last fall. A mini flashlight with a dead battery. Seriously, it's like layers of history in there.

I think it's time to clean my purse.
5/22/2002 10:55:29 AM  



speaking of houses
The Smithsonian's "Within These Walls" exhibit. One house and five families through history.
5/21/2002 02:15:07 PM  



don't breathe now, but...
Trying not to get our hopes up. But it looks like a more permanent residence could (???) be in our not-too-distant future. Prospects look promising.

A house. I can barely imagine. It's been over ten years since I've lived in one.

Curtains on the windows replacing the standard-issue vertical blinds. Bare floor instead of icky carpeting. A garage would be cool, in which to build/paint things? With a little yard and a mailbox. Ooo, and a creepy attic, maybe?

I confess I've already been looking at pictures online, of old bungalows built in 1908, to newer Brady-esque split levels. Geez, they all sound pretty good at this point.
5/21/2002 11:48:33 AM  



what is this, the midwest?
It wasn't registering. What were those deep piles of white on the side of the road, in parking lots? Surely not snow. Nope. Upon closer inspection of our lawns here in Citrus Heights, it's hail. Lots and lots of hail.

At least I didn't see any of today's freakish Sacramento tornadoes.
5/20/2002 05:19:40 PM  



I miss deer
Doing some random browsing today (because the gym classes have taken over my room and it's too loud to think, grrr, don't ask), I bumped into a species I didn't realize existed (bad zoologist, bad). The tule elk: native to California.

The tule elk "scam" exposed, in which a disappointed Lonely Planet writer, expecting to see hordes of them at Point Reyes, saw nothing but poo.
5/20/2002 03:35:31 PM  



it certainly is monday
I'm glad I'm feeling so much better after two days of nothing but sleeping, drinking, and eating. Because today, as it turns out, I need all my strength.

And the X-Files is over. Eh.
5/20/2002 11:35:41 AM  



doh
If you're going to wash your favorite black microfiber tote bag, you really should make sure that the shape-keeping rectangle at the bottom isn't made of cardboard. Which is now sitting in a gross wet lump beneath the lining of the bag, and will have to be removed through one of the lining seams.
5/20/2002 08:23:10 AM  



just please - don't tell my mom
So, yeah - that icky feeling I got at the beginning of the week? Yesterday, I finally faced the fact that what I'm dealing with is a full-blown case of bronchitis/laryngitis. Which makes discipline very interesting, I'll say that much. Lots of pointing, grouchy looks, and loud croaking. How effective.

Not to mention attractive.

I believe it's all because I told D. a few weeks back, "Hey, remember how awfully sick I was all the time last winter? Well, I didn't get really-really sick at all this year! Just a cold and some sinus problems. Woot!"

Curses.

I've been a good girl, getting lots of sleep and pumping the fluids. I'm fairly flooded. And I was feeling much better when I returned safely home for the weekend. So much that I decided I'd brave walking across the complex to pick up a package left for us at the office.

Now, it's not far. And I didn't walk fast. And the package wasn't all that heavy, really. But damn if I didn't feel like death warmed over by the time I reached our door.

I'll be doing lots of nothing this weekend. Luckily there's a new filter on our faucet.
5/17/2002 04:55:08 PM  



a hair-raising return
of the Friday Five

1. What shampoo do you use? Redmond Aussie Mega, punctuated by a weekly dose of Neutrogena.

2. Do you use conditioner? What kind? Pantene Hydrating Curl. Can't exist without it. Nope. Been using Pantene forever.

3. When was the last time you got your hair cut? About two months ago, I guess? Only a trim.

4. What styling products do you use? Pantene Smoothing mousse.

5. What's your worst hair-related experience? 1973-1990.
5/17/2002 01:24:38 PM  



bah
Basketball. Basketball. Ba. Sket. Ball. It's all anyone can talk about around here.

I hate basketball.

It's everywhere. Purple "Go Kings!!!" banners all the way home from work. In the "news."

   "So do you think the Kings are gonna win?"

   "Who do you like better, the Kings or the Lakers?"

   "Did you see the game last night? Wasn't Yadda Hoohooblah awesome? "

   "I got a hot dog at the last game, and had it bronzed! Well, at least the part I didn't eat."

   "I had some of the players autograph my underwear at the Kings game last month, and I've been wearing them ever since. Wanna see?"

Well. Okay. I made that last one up. And... the one before that. But still. It's nauseating. I mean, I was at the parade in downtown Detroit when the Red Wings won the Cup for the first time in decades, and I enjoy a hockey game every now and then. But slavish worship of any sports team leaves me cold. It's disturbing. You might as well just stalk a film star.

Or stand in line for a month waiting for Star Wars tickets. But I guess that's another story...
5/17/2002 01:03:34 PM  



the environment. always with the environment.
Use a cell phone, but don't know what to do with those annoying clunky obsolete models? Don't want to send 'em to the landfill? Well, if you're so inclined, you can donate them for recycling. Through a wonderful program called the Funding Factory, my library can earn printer cartridges and neat school technology for every old phone sent in. Here's a list of qualifying phones for your Excel enjoyment.

Oh, and best of all - you won't have to pay a dime for shipping! I can have UPS prepaid shippers sent directly to you. Cool, or what?

Send me your snail mail if you'd like a shipper sent to you.
5/16/2002 02:34:02 PM  



an update in futility
No, we haven't won the lottery yet. Just in case you were wondering.
5/16/2002 11:44:05 AM  



be it ever so shaky, there's no place like home
Census reveals that over half of California's population is now native.
5/15/2002 11:04:05 AM  



not mine but
Raley's has posted a few photos from the race.
5/15/2002 11:01:12 AM  



bloggerific...?
Hmmm. Intriguing, to say the least.
5/15/2002 08:13:33 AM  



midafternoon whine
My throat is scratchy, and my lungs feel icky. Ever since they turned on the A/C. Coincidence?

I can't control the temperature, and the Almighty Powers won't turn it down when I ask. So I'm about to open all the windows and the door. If my discomfort won't sway them, maybe a gross energy loss will.

Anyone got a Ricola? I ran out.
5/14/2002 02:49:36 PM  



nerd avenger
It's no big secret that I hated junior high. I was angry because we'd just moved away from my beloved Milwaukee, and I didn't know anyone, and was a shy, straight A-getting geek in a school that was at least two years behind where I'd left off. We were poor, and my clothes were awful. My glasses were awful. My hair... well, let's just not go there again.

So I see these similar kids in the library, off in their corners, trying to blend into the woodwork. And the points and whispers aimed in their direction.

Does it make me a terrible grownup if I have to reign myself in daily from using my power (such as it is) to avenge them? Not that I ever would, knowing it'd do more damage than good.

It's awfully difficult to maintain impartiality in this environment.
5/14/2002 10:55:40 AM  



I love Roald Dahl
A little bit from "Danny the Champion of the World:"

   On this Thursday, on this particular walk to school, there was an 
old frog croaking in the stream behind the hedge as we went by.
   "Can you hear him, Danny?"
   "Yes," I said.
   "That is a bullfrog calling to his wife. He does it by blowing out 
his dewlap and letting it go with a burp."
   "What is a dewlap?" I asked.
   "It's a loose skin on his throat. He can blow it up just like a little 
balloon."
   "What happens when his wife hears him?"
   "She goes hopping over to him. She is very happy to have been 
invited. But I'll tell you something very funny about the old bullfrog. 
He often becomes so pleased with the sound of his own voice that 
his wife has to nudge him several times before he'll stop his burping 
and turn around to hug her."
   That made me laugh.
   "Don't laugh too loud," he said, twinkling at me with his eyes. "We 
men are not so very different from the bullfrog."

5/13/2002 02:06:17 PM  



weekend workout
The hunt is back on. Yesterday we combed the tree-lined neighborhoods of downtown Sacramento, looking for likely rentals.

Have I mentioned before that I love, love, love midtown Sacramento? I love it even more than downtown Milwaukee. And that's sheer adoration.

It's at least five degrees cooler down there, because of all the gigantic trees. And the smell! That fresh, flowery smell. Here in Citrus Heights, we get to enjoy the polluted air broiling over the asphalt fields.

Things are pricier down there than I would've thought. For instance - we spotted a duplex in a four-square at 19th and H. In the coincidence of the month, it had been posted on Craigslist the same day, with a whopping pricetag of $1700/month (but if you happen to be a wealthy Sacto reader, you should check it out, it's pretty slick).

So we didn't find anything specific yet, but we remain hopeful (tips would be appreciated and the successful tipper lavished with baked goods and other assorted gifts).

And so this weekend, I got more exercise than I did in the entire month of April, probably. And I didn't even eat that Krispy Kreme I'd threatened to :-)
5/13/2002 09:11:15 AM  



post race notes
* Beautiful, shiny cool morning. Could not have been more perfect for this event.
* Driving the Sacramento freeways at 6 am on a Saturday is truly a zen experience. I should do it more often. I probably won't.
* Wish I'd brought the camera, after all. I wonder if people sensed this? I was asked to take pictures of groups all over the place.
* If you're as uncoordinated and graceless as I am, nothing will drive that home better than attempting "warm-up" Jazzercize in a crowd at 8 am.
* Cal Expo is the perfect place for an event like this. It's interesting, with all the rides set up for the County Fair, and well-treed and flat.
* Along the course for our amusement: an old-time jazz band, an Elvis impersonator (not bad!), and bagpipers (!?!).
* I've learned that I'm in better shape than I thought, especially respiratory-wise, and kept up a speedy pace throughout. But I'm a bit older than the last time I did something like this, so the resulting joint pain was an unwelcome surprise. And I need new running shoes. Boy howdy.
* There were more than 18,000 people on the course, with over $1,000,000 raised. Sacramento rocks.
5/11/2002 10:41:52 AM  



obit
Rest in peace, Talk Soup. You were loved.
5/10/2002 07:45:29 AM  



a-HA!
I can bypass the filter at work by pinging a site to get its IP address, and using that instead of the URL. I didn't believe it would really work, but I finally tried it this morning, and it did. It totally did.

Nyah.
5/9/2002 08:17:17 AM  



me and my anachronistic ways
I've got a plan, see, in my head, and it mixes up all this stuff:

1. Dress like I've seen my Grandma wear in pictures (won pattern on eBay), made of
2. this fabric, which I purchased here, hasn't arrived quite yet
3. worn here
4. on my birthday!!!
5. and then night here.

Dunno about the hair.
5/8/2002 06:20:45 PM  



don't drink the water
Statistic: in less than two years, six of our staff of thirty have been directly involved in the creation of a new baby. That's 20%.

It's almost like an epidemic. Scary.
5/8/2002 02:33:20 PM  



not in my neighborhood
Thanks to D., I know there was a minor quake fifty miles from here about an hour ago. That was information I just might've been able to do without. Not that it's really panic-worthy or anything like that. But I'm still not real comfortable with this whole shaking bit yet.

Didn't feel it here. Did you?
5/8/2002 09:14:43 AM  



happy happy joy joy
Even though I never see any of them, I have the bestest friends in the world. I so do.
5/7/2002 09:44:52 AM  



errmmm...
No, I wasn't doing any sick and disgusting searches when I found this.
5/6/2002 06:04:52 PM  



hum dee dum
So I'm staring at this cart of new books. I've already done the fun part, which is opening the boxes and joyfully leafing through each one, patting myself on the back for making such wonderful choices (thank me very much). But then there's the inventory-ing and catalog-updating and all that other lesser stuff that needs to be done to get them from behind my desk to the shelves.

And it's the end of the day, and I'm dragging my feet.

I'm bored. Tell me something interesting.
5/6/2002 03:16:36 PM  



retro lunch
When my mother and sister and I lived in the old house in Escanaba with my grandmother and grandfather, we ate all of our meals together, including lunch in the summer. Grandpa worked at the community center across town, but he'd always make it home by noon sharp. The meal was carefully planned in advance. One day it would be plates of cold cuts, sliced tomatoes from my aunt's farm garden, and cottage cheese. Another it might be macaroni salad, or grilled cheese and soup, or mini-pizzas. All five of us would sit down around that atomic-era chrome and gold-sparkled formica table, drinking milk from vintage glasses and eating from flowered Pyrex settings.

But always, two loaves of bread were taken from the olive enameled bread box. One white, one dark rye or Roman Meal - or, "Grandpa's bread." My sister and I couldn't see the appeal of that dark, coarse stuff, proclaiming it "gross," chomping happily away on our Wonder.

We only spent two such summers with Grandpa before he died. Eventually, lunches became an individual affair, grabbing the leftover of choice.

Kind of sad, really. I rarely have even dinner at the table now.

But I always have plenty of "Grandpa bread" on hand.
5/6/2002 10:59:52 AM  



that kind of day
Project-killing problems with the sewing machine. Escaped by going to Target. Followed around store by couple who wouldn't let me get my Pantene, and nearly took out my hip ten minutes later. When we returned safely home, I set the bag with the two liters on the higher part of our kitchen counter, from which it rolled off directly on top of one of our few remaining glasses.

I used to have a dozen of those glasses. Now there are five. We're accident-prone that way.

Did you know that Windows XP won't let you directly uninstall IE? Even if it's horribly corrupt, and you just want, NEED to get rid of it? Like, NOW?

Yeah. I didn't, either.
5/4/2002 08:30:20 PM  



verisign is bad
5/4/2002 07:33:50 AM  



kill the salesman
All evening, the phone rings. Our almost-entirely-useless caller ID can provide no information further than "Blocked Call" or "Unknown Number." We simply don't answer it anymore.

But I don't have the option of hiding at work. And so I'm plagued by greedy salesmen. New twist, though - now they don't even bother to call first. They just show up, briefcase in hand, regardless of what I'm doing at the time. I suppose state-wide budget problems have left them in the lurch, made them more aggressive. But stupid. Why would I have any money to spend at the end of the fiscal year? How could I possibly? Does this look like a private school? Is it the new buildings drawing them here? Don't they see we're currently working in decaying glorified trailers? I already get more catalogs in one day than I can wade through. WHY CAN'T THEY JUST LEAVE ME ALONE???

I will not order from these people. If you, of some strange coincidence, happen to be one of these people, be warned that if you show up here I will alert the other librarians in the district that you've been on the prowl, and you will be unceremoniously escorted away by campus security.
5/3/2002 10:14:29 AM  



transparent dangling
A couple of weeks ago I donned a [stupid-looking] red hardhat and toured the school construction site. The new library seems cavernous when compared to this tiny portable room. The ceiling looms two stories above, with skylights shining down. There'll be a gigantic picture window, which now displays a view of the Sierras over a green field (but will be privy to nothing but a strip-mall parking lot within a year). Imagine: a real magnetic security system. And so many wonderful rooms, for storage, for study... for hiding. I stood amongst the steel ribs enclosing what will be the private office, closed my eyes, and imagined locking myself inside for an entire child-free half hour, drinking my V-8 and reading the latest Newbery winner in utter solitude.

That building, which just recently grew its particleboard skin, is my carrot. My big, juicy, million-dollar carrot. I built this library collection from scratch (and how often do you get to do that in a lifetime?), and the thought of giving it a sparkly new mouse-free home, all by myself, is droolificent. With funding inadequacies, the books will look pretty sparse in such a cavernous space. But it'll be my cave.
5/2/2002 02:38:11 PM  



apologies in advance
Fresh word from the Daily Show:

"Trailerparkansas."
5/1/2002 07:09:47 PM  



not necessarily revolutionary, but it's a slow day
WK may have been a real Froot Loop about his "health" sanitarium in Battle Creek, but he did have the right idea about breakfast cereals.

I believe that Frosted Mini-Wheats will be my salvation.

I can't physically make it from breakfast at 5 am to lunch at 1, but I don't have time for snack breaks, either. So it became bad routine to run over to the vending machine and grab whatever was left there that I could graze on between whatever was going on. That had to stop. But what to do? I needed something dry-filling-lowfat-highfiber-energypacked-moderatelytasty.

Mini-Wheats and water. I swear my pants are looser just one box later. And be a good greenie - reuse that Ziploc baggie :-)
5/1/2002 09:14:36 AM