Mashed turnip is supposedly a very convincing low-carb potato replacement. I'm intrigued. See also: mashed cauliflower.

Blackberry tart

Stuffing (wonder where I can get commercially-prepared low carb bread?)

Potatoes au gratin

Cranberry sauce (a la Nigella, especially if I can find cherry brandy in this booze-forsaken town)

Green bean casserole (my first attempt ever)

Parkerhouse rolls (believe me, nothing fancy)

Baked sweet potatoes (at the request of the bub!)

Me: I can't believe that G&G didn't have 
Velveeta. Doesn't every store have it?
D: Where did you look?
Me: Where the cheese slices are.
D: It's not refrigerated!
Me: Whuh???

Terrifying Turkey Taco Tarts

1 lb. ground turkey
4 pkg. (40) refrigerated buttermilk biscuits 
1 pkg. taco seasoning mix
2 c. shredded Mexican cheese mix

For decoration:

Stuffed green olives
Bell peppers
Cocktail onions
Small baby carrots
Grape tomatoes

Preheat oven to 400° Prepare taco meat as 
directed on seasoning packet. Line muffin tin 
with biscuits evenly, two per cup. Spoon meat 
into cups and sprinkle tops with cheese. Bake 
for 15-20 minutes or until golden. 

Cut bell peppers into mouth shapes, press into 
cheese. Cocktail onions and olives make googly 
eyes; use carrots and tomatoes for noses!

4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
2 T olive oil
1 3/4 c crushed tomatoes
1/3 c diced onion
1 medium green pepper, sliced
2 T dry red wine
2 cloves garlic, crushed
2 t oregano
2 t parsley
Shredded Italian cheese blend to taste

Lightly brown chicken breasts in oil. Place
on bottom of cooker. Mix remaining 
ingredients except cheese and pour evenly 
over chicken. Cook on low for 6 to 8 hours. 
15 minutes before cooking is done, sprinkle 
cheese over sauce.

I DECLARE THIS THURSDAY, MAY 20TH, NATIONAL CARB AWARENESS DAY.

That's right. Spread the word. This Thursday everyone--including you--will eat a gratuitous carbohydrate. No, not your daily dose of granola; we're talking a mega-cupcake, or a big black and white cookie. Thursday, we're going start a revolution and start it right. And if you have a website, please spread the word. The more people who know about it, the greater the impact we can make. Plus what else do you have to do? It's not like you have a vibrant social life. I'm just saying.

So, in conclusion, don't do it for your country. Don't do it for your God, or your mother, or your accountant. Do it for the organ that matters most. No, not that one. Do it for your stomach. Only you can save the carbs, America. Won't you?

Easy Cacciatore with Sausage

1 large green pepper
1 medium onion
2 c sliced fresh mushrooms
1 lb boneless skinless chicken breasts, browned
1 lb sweet italian sausage, browned
2 c pasta sauce of your choice
1/2 t dried basil
1/2 t dried oregano

Slice pepper into one-inch strips and onion 
into rings, layer evenly over bottom of crock. 
Sprinkle with mushrooms. Top with chicken 
and sausage, sprinkle spices on top. Cover 
and cook on low for seven hours. Remove 
lid and cook an additional half hour; if 
mixture still looks "watery," stir in a blend 
of 3 T water and 2 T flour. Cook uncovered 
until thickened. Serve with pasta or rice.